Tag: <span>anxiety</span>

Enrollment open for Be The BOSS of Your Story

Checking in to see if you have any questions about, Be The BOSS of Your Story. Hit reply and ask-I’m here for you.

If you’re wondering whether this course is right for you, consider this:

November 2021-

  • Where do you want to be?
  • What do you want to be doing?
  • How do you want to feel? Emotionally? Physically? Spiritually?

The last question is really important because what you do today will set you up for a 2021 so you can:

  • Have a plan for your self-care and be living it
  • Gain tools to help you see choices
  • Have relief from what’s stressing you
  • Be able to work through stressful things and not have them consume you
  • Reduce physical symptoms of stress and anxiety
  • Regain focus and know where to focus

 

You can have this and more!

Remember, this course is NOT therapy but is results oriented using evidence-based, practical, easy-to-learn, powerful information.

Think about: Who do you want to be the BOSS of your story?

See you in the course,

Enroll now

Be safe, be well,

Dr. B.

 

PS: Save the Date: Monday, November 16 @ 7 PM for kick-off/orientation. I’ll send the link on Saturday, November 14, with a brief survey to get us off to a great start.

Self-Care: It’s Not Just Bubble Baths and Chardonnay (Part 3)

Big thanks for your comments. I can feel the momentum building as we get to today’s final installment about self-care.

Just to recap, in the first newsletter, I shared about the importance of self-care and 4 different types of it. Remember, self-care has nothing to do with being selfish, so no need to feel guilty. It is about recognizing your worth, your value, that you’re just as important as a meeting.

In the last newsletter, we talked about how choosing 1 activity from 1 type of self-care can have a domino effect to get you feeling better.

Self-Care: It’s Not Just Bubble Baths and Chardonnay (Part 3)

Also, from the last newsletter, if you’re still wondering what to do with this new found freedom because your time, energy, and maybe even funds, have been freed up, let’s check in with Pam (pseudonym) again.

Remember, she started taking solitary walks to reconnect with herself and started being more assertive with her family to make this time sacred. Freedom for her was, initially, taking those walks. Yet on them, she noticed her mind become more clear, the brain fog was lifting, the volume on the anxious thoughts was lower-in fact she said, those thoughts were actually fading and she was beginning to see choices for her life.

Freedom came to Pam in the shape of a quieter mind (and body) where she could start planning what she wanted to do next. She now had time to think about starting back playing piano again, doing watercolors, and reconnecting with a couple of old friends she’d lost touch with. She now had the time, emotional energy and bandwidth to do this, whereas before, most of her time was used rehearsing thoughts of regrets, dread, and what ifs.

This is possible for you too!

What if you could…

  • Recognize and handle anxiety and stress
  • Experience inner peace and feel happy inside
  • Say NO, mean it, and stick to it!
  • Turn a bossy mind into a helpful ally
  • and Make yourself the most important meeting of the day?

 With that, I invite you to join my upcoming BETA Version collaborative, interactive, and experiential 5-week course. We’ll address being pushed, pulled, and stretched thin during these uncertain times. Yes, it’s time for some serious self-care!

This is NOT therapy, but a course where you’ll learn skills, new information, and create strategies so you can deal with stressful, anxiety provoking, or uncertain situations with calm, confidence, clarity, and creativity.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to be on the lookout for my next email on Monday AM with all the details. This is a limited offer to you my newsletter subscribers who have journeyed with me over the past 9 years.

Stay tuned; your new life is waiting…Talk with you on Monday,

Be safe, be well

Dr. B.

 

 

 

Self-Care: It’s Not Just Bubble Baths and Chardonnay (Part 2)

In the previous newsletter, I shared about the importance of self-care and 4 different types of it. Remember, self-care has nothing to do with being selfish, so no need to feel guilty. It is about recognizing your worth, your value, that you’re just as important as a meeting (actually, I believe you’re way more important than any meeting!).

And thanks for your comments and questions. I’m keeping them close as I lead up to Part 3 and beyond.

Today, let’s meet Pam (pseudonym). She called me on a 104 degree Monday afternoon saying she needed to see me right away; that she couldn’t take it anymore.

Self-Care: It’s Not Just Bubble Baths and Chardonnay (Part 2)

We met via my secure video platform. Pam is in her early 50’s but looks like in her early 40’s. She presents well and looks like she has it all together.

She’d told me she’d spent last Saturday afternoon literally sitting in her closet, crying, because “ I didn’t know what else to do”.

Pam said, “Dr. B., I know I first gotta get a handle on this stress or anxiety or whatever it is and then I know my life will start working again, I’ll be my old self again”.

I gently smiled, looked her in the eyes, and said, “Pam, I hear you. If you’re willing, let’s do something a little counterintuitive. Let’s work backwards on this and what I mean by that is, the first thing we need to do is NOT get a handle on stress or anxiety.

The first thing we need to do is to get a handle on you – take care of you. What I hear you telling me is that you’re going, going, doing and doing, for everybody except yourself. And this pandemic, it’s making it worse. You’re telling me that you feel guilty when you try to take time out for yourself. You know what it sounds like — you’re stretched thin, like butter, spread over too much bread.

I think it might be a good idea for us to start exploring what being there for you could look like. Let’s get a handle on that first and the stress and anxiety –they’ll start getting handled as we put some good self-care into place. What do you think?”

After Pam and I briefly discussed different types of self-care, Pam decided she wanted to start with spiritual self-care.  She shared she used to consider herself a spiritual person, but lately, she’d lost touch with that too. From our talk, she chose solitary walks in her local park as a way to reconnect with herself.

So her homework was to start incorporating these walks, no kids, no dog-just herself and her mask (she might pass someone on the way and masking up is excellent self-care!). Research continues to show the benefits of being out in nature to calm the mind as well as calm the body.

She agreed to take 3 – ambitious – before our next session. To ensure she was able to follow through, we also came up with a new personal boundary and an assertive statement she’d use with her family when she was planning her alone (i.e. walk) time. She was excited and said, “This could actually work. I’m starting to feel better already”.

I’ll bet some of you are saying, “But this won’t work for me. I really need to do something about my stress and anxiety BEFORE I start working on myself.  And going for walks, that’s just too simple”.

I’m gonna counter this and say, by working on yourself first, you’ve already started working on the stress and anxiety.

How?

Because when you start, like Pam did, choosing and putting in place different types of boundaries (emotional self-care) and being more assertive (more emotional self-care), you’re already laid solid groundwork for decreasing the possible sources and symptoms of stress and anxiety in your life.

For example, when you say No and mean it (boundary/emotional self-care), you free up your time, energy, and possibly funds and can now use those where they’re most needed, which in turn gives you more freedom. We all want more freedom don’t we? What will yours look like?

That’s the question, because now, with more freedom, there’s a new void and since nature abhors a vacuum, you’ll probably want to fill it, but with what?

I’ll share some ideas to help you untangle this in the next newsletter. Stay tuned; your new life is waiting…

Be safe, be well

Dr. B.

Back To Basics: 4 Ideas To Keep You Going Strong

How ‘ya holding up these days?

So many people are being hammered by negative stress, anxiety, anger, fear, depression, and a few other things. So much to think about to take care of yourself and those you love.

What are you doing to keep yourself mentally, physically, and spiritually uplifted? Feel free to share your ideas with me-I may even collate them and share them back with all of you (minus any identifying info of course!).

For many, it’s coming down to the basics:

1. Focus on what you can control. Worrying about something you can’t control only keeps any anxiety-igniting thoughts alive and well. There are some things you can control; decide on those and do them.

2. Reconnect with your body. Do a body scan, find any areas of tension, and then BEFORE you do your deep breathing, tighten the tense part even more, THEN, do your deep breathing to relax it.

3. Acknowledge any intrusive thoughts or strong feelings. Be gentle with yourself about this. If you have a mind, it’s gonna wander, so do your best to not dwell on these particular thoughts or feelings-that only keeps your amygdala activated, which keeps the body in a state of anxiety. You certainly don’t need that now.

4. Find ways to laugh. Whether it’s funny jokes shared online, silly videos, funny movies, or TV shows, find ways to laugh. There are several online sites that have some really funny jokes-laughter is great medicine to decrease negative stress and build resilience. Maybe even try laughter yoga.

5. Stay connected. We’re all in this together and we’ll get through it together, but right now, we have to remain physically apart. However, don’t let physical isolation turn into social isolation-stay in touch with family, friends, and neighbors. Now we can use technology as a force for good to stay connected.

As for me, I’m keeping a quote by His Holiness The Dalai Lama, very close:

“Every day, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others; to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others. I am going to benefit others as much as I can.” 

I’m also keeping the exercise up to keep my immune system, especially my IgA and IgG up (thank my good friend and colleague, Ken Nedd, MD for this information).

We will get through this,

As always, I love helping women live happier lives. Whether you call it depression, anxiety, stress, or nerves, I’d like to help. I invite you to call me at 512.680.2874 for your free (up to) 15-minute phone consultation. Let’s discuss how I may be able to help.

And remember, TBC is completely online now, which frees up your time so you can enjoy your life more!

Looking forward to hearing your story and helping you feel better,

Stay healthy and connected,

Dr. B.

Ideas To Keep The Negative Stress At Bay During This “New Normal”

Wow-what a difference a week makes. Early last week I was making plans to give some community talks, but then, BAM-I don’t think they’re gonna happen in the time frame I thought.

There’s so much more I wish I could share with you in this particular short newsletter about ways to deal with any worry, anxiety, and fears, but I want to keep it very easy on you because I know you’ve got a lot to think about these days.

Here are 5 ideas to keep worry, anxiety, and fears (WAF’s) at bay:

1.  Recognize and get comfortable with uncertainty
Think about it-we all live with a lot of uncertainty on a daily basis. For example, any time you take a shower, you could fall in the tub and hurt yourself. But does that stop you from taking a shower? No, because you don’t dwell on that fact, which makes it a lot easier to take a shower.  When someone constantly focuses on uncertain situations, it keeps the amygdala activated, which is a recipe for more worrying, anxiety, and fear. It becomes a vicious cycle. You can choose differently, recognize that uncertainty is very common, thus enabling you to have more control over your thoughts.

2. Keep what’s happening in perspective
A quick way to keep from having WAF’s is to limit media time. Ask yourself how much time, how much of my precious life and energy, am I willing to give up to upsetting media coverage? Yes, stay informed (more on that later) however it’s important that you limit exposure to what you hear on TV and read online and re-focus on what’s good and positive in your life as well as the things you do have control over.

3. Keep in touch with those you care about and who you know care about you
Using CDC guidelines about social distancing, reach out to those important to you. Yes, I too believe in the power of hugs, but social distancing protects you and the ones you love. Use technology, if you have it – a simple phone call, text, or video call may increase feelings of connectedness, which can help keep you calmer.

4. Continue your health promoting routine
If you’ve ever worked with me, you may remember the encouragement to create a wellness lifestyle, which includes exercise or some type of movement. Exercise is a great way to decrease WAF’s because you have to really focus as you do it so you don’t hurt yourself. It’s also a way to integrate your body, mind, and spirit to keep the stress hormones at bay. Keep on moving!

5. Start or continue to make happiness or contentment your focus
As you focus on the good already in your life (from #2), consider intentionally taking it in. Dr. Rick Hanson*, a neuropsychologist offers us this suggestion through H.E.A.L.:

H: Have a positive experience. Notice or create it, like the sun coming up in the morning, a baby’s smile as they crawl towards you, or calling your bff and sharing your day.

E: Enrich it. Hold this new positive experience in you for 5 seconds or longer. Use all your senses to truly feel it.

A: Absorb it: Allow this really good experience to become part of you so that it feels as comfortable as your favorite pair of shoes.

L: Link positive and negative material. Even if you have something negative in the past, allow the positive experience you’ve been having to remain front and center. See if you can remain with the positive and let go or simply allow the past negative event to be present without focusing on it.

Last, it’s important to be concerned, stay informed, and not panic. Choosing credible information sources, such as CDC, can help and give you the information you need.

As always, I love helping women live happier lives. Whether you call it depression, anxiety, stress, or nerves, I’d like to help. I invite you to call me at 512.680.2874 for your free 15-minute phone consultation. Let’s discuss how I may be able to help.

And remember, TBC is completely online now offering video sessions, which frees up your time so you can enjoy your life more!

Looking forward to hearing your story and helping you feel better,

Dr. B.

*Hanson, R. (2013). Hardwiring Happiness: The Practical Science of Reshaping Your Brain-and Your Life. Random House.